The last thing that i want will always be the only thing i end up with...

As the title stated, "The last thing that i want will always be the only thing i end up with..."

Since i can remember, all the things that i labeled as my last choices will be the one that i end up with. In my young days, i used to say that i will never enroll into form six as at that moment i used to think that it's a waste of time and uncool but in the end, i end up enrolling into it anyway. I even decline the offer i get into the matriculation school which i was offered 2 years programs. Maybe it was just not my destiny since i only knew about it by the closure of the registration date. Most of my teachers at that time ran all over the school, chasing after me, trying as hard as they could to change my mind into going to matriculation school but all their effort was simply vain. By the time they meet with me, I had decided to just go with form six for transferring will likely be a hassle for me and hassle is the last thing that i want...(but it will always show up *sigh*).

Luckily my gamble turned out to be quite good as form six was not as bad as people think it is. I still have the leisure to relax and learns lot of new thing i never will if i had go to matric. Lets just say that it help me to become a bit more mature in dealing life.

Then there goes myself talking with my friend at form six about choosing our university. Knowing me, i simply said that any university will be fine by me as long as it's not in sabah or kelantan. With that said, finally few months after i said it, WALAH the result come out... i was offered banking at UMK which is located at Kelantan, the one place i don't want to be for some reason. ( Sorry to say but i don't favour PAS or most politic parties therefore NO)

As the result come out, i was shocked! My eyes felt as if they were going to pop out anytime, my body is sweating...cold and my hand was trembling...and there i goes clicking the refresh button...once...still the same
twice...same...third time..nothing changed...fourth time..sorry unable to proceed comes out...the line was busy anyway with thousand of STPM candidates across the country are online trying to check their application result...
"Oh my god...Is this really happening?" i said as my heart felt really heavy; as if the weight of the whole world was lifted by it. For days i cant eat well...i cant sleep well either....I was like a soulless being...a vessel without a soul...then i decide not to sweat about it as my sister has promised to help me change the university from UMK to UMS but i ask her to change to UMSKAL for at least it is not in Sabah. My days of calling UMK day by day to check whether my request for changing university can be fulfill and finally after almost three weeks of pressuring them, they give in to my request and i had successfully made a record; being the first student to change university without having to wait one semester.

As i enjoyed my day at KAL ( the day that i decided to check out the PTPTN ) , an unfamiliar number called me ( At that moment, i was waiting for my lecturer to register for the course ), its a number from KL or something like that. I answered it and it was actually from Kementerian Pelajaran Malaysia. The reason they had called me was to inform me that i have been given a chance to become a teacher. At that time i was shocked. Yes...I have tried to apply for it but i failed and Yes i have asked my sister to send a letter to KPM, begging to be given an opportunity to become a teacher ( used to say that last thing i will become is a teacher as well) but my sister forgot to send it...so i was feeling doubt whether to quit the international marketing program or continue...at last i decided that being a teacher gives a lot more benefit than studying at KAL..

Well you might call it a fluke or tada no guzen but be careful at what you might wish or said cause the last thing you want might be the only option you will have... Creepy isn't it?

Between Hate and Allowance

Between Hate and Allowance stands myself victimized by the situation, flicking the flame of anger inside others like the friction of two stick sparking flame when rubbed together. I look at their eyes and i saw disappointment, all the eyes that's used to be full of hope, now searching for something to channel all their rage and blame into one entity , truly saddening yet understandable that I can almost suffocate just by thinking about it.

What shall be done and what have been done, the more i think the more it all points to me.
"Oh God, what have i done and what have been done to me?" I asked.
I pray and try to listen but silence is all i can hear. Was it me or just my ego? I don't know anything at the moment as my mind keeps on spinning back and forth, wandering in the vast oceans of memories inside my thick block-headed brain.

Looking back at the incident,I asked them whether I shall fill in a new form or just do the initial and with ease they answered just do the initial. For listening to their instruction, I payed the price. I was asked to redo my form 3 days before semester break approximately 3 weeks after i submitted it with all the other student. Now, all of my batch will and definitely have been blaming me for not getting their allowance earlier for I am like a stone blocking the passage between their allowance and themselves which is now filled with hatred towards me.

From KAL to Gaya ,From marketing to being a teacher...

Is it just me or is life really a funny ironically...

When i was young a little boy,i found that being teacher is a troublesome job and too much of a hassle.These idea lasted until i went to form 6 and now I'm a teacher in training at IPG maktab gaya. don't you think it's funny?

Most of my family consist of teacher and that makes me know how was the life of those who're involved with this profession.Wouldn't it be much better if i just continue studying at KAL in International Marketing? Who knows?

This is the choice that I've made and I will keep on living up to it.Life to me are truly amusing...

the junction of life

It has been a long time since i blogged...

so many thing happened ...i went to MUNSYI test which was a qualifying exam for USM....

and well i got called for an interview for TESL although it's just primary school teacher...well i was quite nervous when i went to the interviews....

i saw many people...smart looking and well behaved so i assumed that most of them were better than me in English so i just sit around at the corner and watching people

(an activity i used to do when i was in a foreign place...),examining them,try to figure out as many thing as i could that i can use to strike a conversation but in the end i decide to be myself...

whenever i was at someplace foreign,i just keep my cool and shut up although i can strike a conversation if i want to...it's just that having a father that was too friendly kinda give me the impression that it was not such a good thing to do...just let the others do the talking unless it's necessary because to me listening to others give us an advantage...

and then we were called...got 30 minutes to finish up the INSAK test...kinda like MUNSYI...it was a logical question and it took me only 10 minutes to finish...i waited for the test to end as my stomach growls a bit...oops...havent feed the puppy i thought ...hehehehe

afterwords we were given a 10 minute break which was finish in silence as i was in the beginning..then it was time for the group interview....my assumption was wrong...not to be proud but all of the other men was not very comfortable to speak in english like me(thanks to four month babysitting my niece and nephew,im used to speak in english)

i tried as hard as i could to contribute for the group and myself...and it worked...yay...thanks to Md.Fikri,an ex-matriculation student who volunteered himself to be the head of discussion although i was the one doing most of the supporting part...when we're finished, all of the men comes to me and thank me for my support in the discussion and just like that we all became familiar with one another...

what a good feeling...contributing to others...and then it is time for me to have my individual interview as i was the no 1 in the name list...i was asked for many things which i can answer with mixed language occasionally such as "penganggur" because i kept remembering one of those guys word for penggangur which was "grape seeder" which makes me forgot that penganggur is in fact unemployed....LOL...

i was also asked about current issue and to my dismay , why oh why did i talk about the red shirt workers in thailand...i was going to talk about soccer actually....and when one of the interviewer comment that my view was weak that most of the english teacher nowadays are women so i want to change that presumption..my true nature was unleashed for a minute...i was debating with him and in the end he loss to me...take that for provoking me...lol

although i am very tired mentally and also a bit hungry, but i think all well ends well...he and she was smiling at me when i was finished..wah....hope i can get the job

hari yang sungguh malang

setelah lama sy x berblog tiba2 rasa macam mo berblog saja ni ari...butul2 malang nasib sa...tiba2 kena block account FB sa....sa sangat2 la sedih

an unusual day

last night i went to sleep at 10pm...feel so sleepy suddenly...hehehe
i felt relaxed but all the spm candidate must be feeling nervous & anxious ATM...hehehe

well,one thing that could make me tired today was probably the driving thingy...one thing i like about driving in kk is the traffic light but ironically that is also one of the thing i hate...2 hour of driving and it's one hell of a pain in the ass to keep on pressing the clutch...now i can understand my father, brothers & sister feeling driving in kk..zz

Missed Blogging

Ram Yun mee and Pizza Hut~







Inilah favorite bug sorang...Kutuk2




Time sorang masak french fries...






Halu evry1...long time no blogging aa...haiya..

So many thing's happened...eating...eating..cooking n spm result anouncement...oh yeah and i've started taking the 8 hour class...just finished 2 hour this day...waa..

i don't have problem with the parking and 3 movement's but i seem to have problem concerning the clift parking....i cant seems to park it right....weather it's passed the line or be4 the line....zzz

and when i'm going back my instructor ask me too keep on driving till home...waw...so good to be able to drive past gear 3...

Trip to kk

waa~sleep around 11 last night...listening to our karaoke records...wakakakka
i asked my nephew to wake me up at 6.30am but i only wake up at 9am...the medicine i take before going to sleep was very good...

went to kk at 10.30am...arrived at tamparuli at 11.45am..singgah sebentar makan mee goreng kering sasau....

BE4



After




then arrived safely at TPJ at 12.30pm..peace

what an exhausting day

time kami makan..c tantai sama c liwin ja sa tegambar




waa~ panat wo sy hari ni...sa p sikul jam 9.30 pagi sudah...patut jam 9 lagi daa...kcian drg menunggu..hehehe

anyway kami berjalan2 la d sikul sambil2 ambil slip stpm...waa no 19 kasai jugalah sy keselueuhan...hehehe sedih lagi sy rasa ni kali berbanding yg dulu lps habis sekolah...nasukashi naa~

kami ada jugalah kana bawa bergambar sama2 pengetua...kena suruh tulis kata2 peransang & isi alumni...babah..sy lupa isi..kakakka surat berhenti sekolah pun blm lagi sy siap...alala biarlah...kuli c Ron p ambil sekali sekala...

trs kami p kadai...1 thing in mind...*MAKAN*..lapar bah...jam 1 sudah kami sana.,lepas makan kamiurang p karaoke...lama2 jugalah kami berkaraoke..kalah juga durang c awie..kakakaka

next..kami p main snooker sana aramith...menang jugalah dua2 set...hehehe champin2 suda d sy eii..

ranau sweet ranau

yay...im here again... today i went back to ranau from kk....preoccupied with WII...so fun to play and exercise at the same time... waa~ smackdown vs raw ...so nice to pedigree

and also today i got a new haircut...thanks to my nephew..cool

wakakakak SO Full..

waa....kenyang oo sorang hari ni...kami berBBQ...
ada lamb,chicken and pork...waa last night i marinate the chicken wing with just bbq sauce,salt n sugar+garlic,red onion,and *serai*...
it turned out to be quite good actually after been marinated for 1 day...
mmm...delicious...maybe i will be considering chef as a profession...

Ohh...HAppy Day

Oh happy day..o GOD...tqtqtqtqttqtqttqtqttqtqttqtqtqtqttq x INFINITI.....waahahhahah

waa...thank lord....since last night i cant seem to rest easily...what the heck i said...then i turned to god ...we chated for almost an hour...thinking about the past and the future things....

this morning...i woke up with a heavy chest...noo...god why o why...and i tried to go downstairs slowly...and it's finally 12pm...man...and i became restless...ooooo man...dengan hati yang berat saya tetap mencheck keputusan STPM sy melalui SMS...STPM jarak no IC sy yang comel...dan saya hantar kepada 36363...punya la lambat sy bilang...jam 1 suda sy tunggu belum ada balasan...tiba2 datanglah sms RM0:servis is currently availbale...PUKITAI

sy terpaksa juga check on9...haishh dengan hati yang semakin berat walaupun badan sy mimang sudah berat...sy mula mencek...3 kali sy cuba failed ja...time ke 4..tiba2...


selalu 4 nombor malang ba kan...TADA!!! keluar pula itu result....i'm speechless ...x sangka dapat A juga pengajian am n sej B-...2 subjek yang sy selalu dpt c n d ja selalu...haiyah...ss c+..selalu A daa...eko n geo yang selalu D...dpt C..ish2ishish...syukur kepada tuhan STPM 2009 sy dapat juga 5P...

aww..

headache .... maybe im too stressed?? or maybe the bump that cut my head a little is the source... i dont know...i dont even care...awww stupid...having a really bad time...tomorrow is the day and cant even watch lost....grr

http://www.astrology.com/horoscopes/capricorn/daily-overview/tomorrow

http://www.astrology.com/horoscopes/capricorn/daily-overview/tomorrow

Tomorrow is the day...waaa...mo cek fung shui lu....

LOL...oo...noo..butterfly in my stomach...lol..x taw la kenapa??? apa saja yang saya buat sekarang semua x keruan saja ni...OMG...tomorrow...tomorrow...the big day...the question is "Will i be able to gather courage to check STPM my result???"....u tell me...

Shocking...shocking

OMG...so much shocking story la...Batista win the WWE champion after beating cena after he win the elimination chamber...Jericho win the heavyweight title after HBK knock down The Deadman with some sweet chain music...and Edge will face Jericho at Wrestlemania...WTF
why you john cena...how dare you STF triple H...

Also this year seems to be not a very good year for those who were born at the year of monkey and dog....a while ago my brother got into an accident at work...got a scar at his face near the eyebrow alyhough he used a glue stitches...lol now my other brother got into an accident at work...twisted his hand near the gearbox...almost cut his thumb...5 stitches woo...

well u can call me superstitious but im not although sometime we have to....sigh~ my horoscope says that im lucky this year and i've taste a bit of it...wonder if my luck will help me in my stpm result...I hope it does..ooo please GOD...(see ..people tend to ask thing from god only when they're in need....typical me)

Tuesday...tuesday and it's 2 day away...OMG

OMG...i cant believe it... waa... T-T
2 days to go...waaaaaaa~seems like it's still very hard to believe that KEPUTSAN STPM 2009 AKAN KELUAR PADA 25.02.2010...oh no..
i've finished cooking some soy sauce pork stew just now...semms earlier than usual i've finished early because the kid's are all sick and they didn't go to school today...nowadays weather are making people sick woo..haishh

Although i think and act as if i dont care about my result...still i cant stop thinking that the date is approaching and time flies as im writing... :-(
Feeling tired..dont want to do anything..think anything...waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Is this what human call stress??
It cant be because ...i never stressed before...I'm me...Happy-go-lucky is my personality...oo..nooo...

waa...nocturnal life

hehehe its 15minute before 12...dub dab dub dab...my heart is beating fast,almost as fast as my brother beating the drum...waa suddenly remembered it's only 2day away...waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

btw ...today i filled in maktab application form online....well for you who are interested to become sk teacher...chek out this link http://apps.emoe.gov.my/kplspm/kplspm_jun_2010/index.cfm

also i am currently on lost season 5 marathon (you can watch it here http://www.tvduck.com/Lost.html)
and i've finished watching dragon ball kai ep 45 herehttp://www.watchanimeon.com/dragon-ball-kai-episode-45/

...anyway i wonder why chuck s3 ep 7 havent come out??? hmmm

monday..monday

sempat berposing...cewah


kereta penguatkuasa

What Day Is Today? It's Monday....today finally i'll be going back to KK...no need for taxi when i can hitch a ride on lorry ..hahaha

waa...what a trip i have today...1 time ever...going to kk by lorry!!!
have u ever done it be4??? hahahha
well we suppose to left on 8.30am but after dealing with some stuff such as the road tax & engine oil, we can only leave at 9.50am....wakakakkakakak

The trip was not very pleasuring...why?? If u have two old timers with you talking like they know everything all the way to kk about stuff u know better...well i guess it somewhat pleasuring after all...cause it funny when they talk nonsense like they know it..wakakkakka + empty stomach all the way...wow unbelievable...hehehe

At 12.00pm FINALLY we've arrived at TPJ....waaa thank lord....

Sunday Morning+Bad Day

WTF...itbegins last night when MU lost to Everton 1-3 and so i say "What else can go wrong?"...stupid me for asking....i fall asleep and woke up late this morning so i miss Sunday Mass(or was it intentional??? >.< )hehehe

When i woke up at 8.10am i went to play SA for a while before taking a shower..at 8.50am I was all ready to go to KK(supposedly) but i missed all the taxi's and buses...
][_ O ][_ betul2 la....

sunday morning

waa...last night Man Utd lost to everton 1-3...damn it...and today i suppose to go to kk already but ][_ O ][_ maybe i will go be4 noon...still MU is the best GLORY>>>GLORY MAN UTD...>< _ ><

Stress...stress

OMG...today i've just found out that 2009 STPM result would be out next week at thursday 25/02/2010,,what the...it's been so long since i've been thinking about it so it kinda freaks me out....ouch~ got a butterfly in my stomach...
i've confirmed it by asking the teachers and searchin the news...so i guess i will be taking my result whether on monday or tuesday the week after result's are out..

waa

it's 8.15pm...i'm very disappointed because the percy jackson and the lightning thief that i downloaded graphic suck...but still i watch it unwillingly waa...mau tingu yang bagus graphic tapi malas mo tunggu...

What a Lucky day...

wow...what a way to begin life...
Today...today...18.02.2010 what a lucky day for me...It all started when i woke up early at 7.30 am,I played SA and i won all the knife match even though i'm completely NOOB at it...

][_ O ][_

Then again,i went to school around 9.17am and i found one of my best friend Tantai waiting for me already at pondok nostalgia SMKL ...wakakkaakka
we waited for my other best friend Ronald and Adly before meeting with Lee at the school canteen..i consider meeting all of them as luck cause they have been with me all this time....i also meet one of my favorite teacher Mr.Samson there...he asked us whether we're confident of getting good result and i answer "Bulibah"without thinking...aww~ me and my big mouth again...but still word are prayer itself,so hopefully....

We went to the school admin building and meet several teacher including Mr.Principal himself...when i meet him,i was kinda like"Ouch.."when he mention my letter where i wrote I WILL TRY to become a lawyer as an excuse to change classes...waaa...me and my big EGO then...lol...but still...all went well...i've got A for my KOKUM and i was invited to be a part of Red Cross volunteer in March..waaa~

Then we went to pekan and eat at Koktas...wow buli tahan...less 20% sebab ada Ronald...kakkakaka TQ pren...well anyway after that we all went to play snooker at Aramith...i start playing with Tantai cause we're both merely just beginner...well anyway i win and i don't feel great about beating mere beginner...then i played with Ronald who's much advance than us...(he's also the one who teach me how to play)..and i won the 2nd match fluky..and he want's another rematch...and i won again fluky...lol..belasahan ba c kawan walaupun puluk ja siurang...kikiki

Then it's time to go home..i was planning on walking home from the bridge to our home but it seem's that luck simply can't leave me alone yet...there's a road block at Poulian and the driver decide to take our village road as a detour to lohan...wow~~~ lucky

Thursday morning

Just wake up...stilll sleepy...#%$...finished downloading percy jackson and the lightning thief and it's time to watch them..hehehe 9am i got to go to my old school SMK Lohan...waaa....sia mo urus itu KOKUM punya markah...dengar khabar rendah ja markah kena bagi sama batch kami....
:-(

today..today

Hello every one...
This is the first time i'm feeling kinda want to post something on my blog...hahaha now that i'm no longer a student...feel's like i got all the time in the world....
Today is my 6th day at "Kampung"...waa..how time flies...feel's like it's only yesterday i was at Taman Putrajaya....and i have till sunday before going back to TPJ again with the real life so i'll just lay around ,enjoying lifes as it is for now...

The day before I remember my mom saying something like "Bisuk mau mula suda itu puasa daging."and i answered "Ok." but in the afternoon today...I forgot all about it and cooked some chicken and only realized half way through (silly me)....so i kinda became the source of sin in our house today....

In the evening,while i was playing Sudden Attack...my mom once again called me"Dido,mau p angkat padi moti ni kali..sudah sia kasi tau kau yang dulu lagi kan" and i was like..."Oww...I forgot...damn,why was it again that my brother didn't went home? Oh..ya...dia kana suru kerja pula tu time CNY,TERPAKSALAH saya pigi angkat padi ni kalau begitu."...
3.45pm(supposed to be 3pm but i delayed it)...i went to the paddy-field with Kedik,Mami & Bapa...took us 5minute by car to Mr.Ghani house(car park lot) and another 5 minute to our "sulap"...dari dulu sampai sekarang...x sah kalau x nokoduhel barang 1x...kakkaka but today i didn't koduhel...yesss..when we get there i saw a slimy white thing with big eyes..looking at me..and snap""

I t ook a picture of it...(see profile photo)...it jump to me before jumping to nearby papaya tree...hehehe...enough talking about the frog...I carried 2 trip of paddy...panat jugalah...dengan belakang yang terseliuh hampir 3 minggu gara2 salah tidur....kakakakaa and in the night we have to go to Ashes Wednesday Mass...took almost 1 hour...supposed to begin at 7 but it only start at 7.20pm...dari duluuuuuuu lagi sikap orang kampung x pandai berubah,,,jam 7 bilang,,,jam 7 lebih sampai haish....

i went home...watched American Idol and Glee and bloging...
and that's almost about everything i happen to live today...God Bless